Before I Step In – September 23, 2022

I was supposed to wring my brain out and get things out of my head and into words before I embarked on a journey – oh, what the hell. I wanted to just let things out before I’m loaded with so much input later on today, as I join this year’s leadership summit, held by our church. I’m not particularly sure why I want to do this, perhaps it’s selfish in nature – a way for me to say what I want to say before I hear other people say it.

I’m already anticipating what Pastor Joedy has to say – something to the lines of what it really means to ‘know’ God; and it’s not so much information as it is intimacy. I’m pretty sure we wrote about that here.

Wow, this is really selfish. Must be my thing to want to say something before I hear it from someone else. Even if it is Pastor Joedy.

Anyway. I sincerely wish all of us well as we go through this day. So much talk about ‘new’ things, but not much recognition for what’s already been new with regards to processes and systems. People don’t say it, but it’s not ‘new’ until they say it is, and I think that’s a faulty way to think of things.

Gosh, I really am kicking myself in the nuts here. It’s a full-on cycle I’ve been dragged into, doing the things that I’ve resented being done to me. The thoughts that come up as I’m writing all this make it clear that I’m obviously coming into this entire ‘summit’ with an equally faulty mindset.

So sure, this may come off as a rant. But I suppose, as I continue to write, that clarity would just make itself known. For I am even now reminded of how I find my validation, my satisfaction, my motivation and inspiration in Christ. And for everything that presents itself as threatening, or whatever I choose to be threatened by, I know for a fact that my God is with me, and knows precisely how I feel; for the most part this allows me to just keep my peace, knowing that even if I don’t get satisfaction in the hours and the couple of days to come, He is with me through it all and is experiencing the entire cocktail of emotions with me.

Maybe I just needed to get this out of my chest before I did anything else today.

God is with me. He is for me. He is right here, right now. He is feeling what I’m feeling, so I can feel what I feel without hesitation, knowing that His grace and glory, His power and His peace are infused with me.

Father, thank You for Your lovingkindness that endures, even during this time.

Jesus, thank You for making it all possible.

Holy Spirit, thank You for guiding me, projecting through me and allowing me to graciously respond.

All the glory and honor is Yours, forever.

This isn’t a thousand words by a long shot, but it helped me. Until next post, God bless you.

I won’t be afraid

You are here

You silence all my fear

I won’t be afraid

You don’t let go

Be still my heart and know

I won’t be afraid