Current Position (De-Vision, chapter II)

I welcome the end. The end makes space for beginnings.

Ultra Instinct. No Mind. Autopilot. That’s what I want right now. No emotions. Learn from the past, move in the present, confident of the future.

Check that – no need for emotions, because I know I am loved. I am loved by a perfect love which has me overflowing, moving without fear, and also moving without feeling. All this time resting, in the sense that I am at peace knowing that in all things I am loved by God, because of Christ, with whom I am one, together, forever.

In the light of autopilot, I am contemplating, rather, implementing systems to achieve more on a daily basis – Just so there’s more time to devote to other projects. These include a daily general routine and a social media strategy.

The latter is out of the fact that whether we like it or not, we already have a personal brand established, and it’s really up to us whether we take charge of it or let the world create and update it for us. I choose to take charge in the name of clarity, to go deeper to grow taller.

I take back some of what I talked about in my last post, for it implies that we ought to pursue thankfulness. This to me is us placing our focus on ourselves and our performance once again. No, we ought to understand that Christ and His finished work has us enveloped, indeed immersed in a default vision established, rooted, and strengthened in perfect love – one that has us being thankful automatically. In other words, we ought to believe, against our former (read: dead) nature, that as we are righteous no matter how we feel, we are also thankful no matter how fucked up the odds are. Cuss word, as always, for emphasis.

Perfect love casts out all fear. As we see Christ’s faithfulness in this eternal truth, our natural stance would be to be thankful, and from here the wonder blooms, and foresight takes solid ground. For as the presence of love implies the absence of fear, so the absence of fearfulness implies the default presence of raw worship – gratefulness, thankfulness, awe, wonder, call it what you want it, Christ started it because He loved us first.

In practical application, the 5pm service has chosen first to assess the situation before any sort of vision can be defined. In the process an area of improvement was exposed – our default action was to identify problems and weaknesses and call that our situation. However, by Christ who was the common wisdom dwelling among us all, we were quick to review and define why our pastors and core members choose to stay.

A beautiful answer was placed into words, and to my surprise, echoed by the rest in attendance – that we welcome all into our ‘home’. We call to one and all, no matter where they think they stand in the social hierarchy, to come as you are. This is not to say that we are pushovers. No, in this we also see that the grace of God has strengthened us to the point of sheer confidence in facing who the world calls absolutely ugly with a perfectly beautiful love.
I’ll be honest. I’ve been on the edge since last week, when certain facts just really dawned on me and hit home. I’m about to sleep, wake up, have the car checked, and drive down to Bauang to meet our church pastors for a self-proclaimed planning session – one which inadvertently has us doing something they all like doing – vision casting.

I suppose I should be thankful. The heavy, heavy frustration I’ve had since last week has turned into anger, and now, with the events of this day in mind, there seems to be a legitimate outlet for that anger. I’m calm as a bomb, and the force from this energy will certainly be spent wisely.

(To be concluded?)

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