Toothpicks. For My Eyes.

Close to 12 hours ago I blogged, lamenting my coffee-induced sleeplessness before saying I would try praying. Sure enough, I was reminded that prayer is direct communication to God made possible by Jesus Christ’s blood, and not just a sleeping pill. I was, in fact, rejuvenated – if only for the moment I spent crying out to the Father – that I would cover all bases I was led to recall.

God is true to His word indeed. He hears us when we call out His Name, that we would be saved (Acts 2:21); and while this did not necessarily mean I was struck asleep I was instead led to His word in 1 Chronicles 22:19:

Now set your heart and your soul to seek the Lord your God; arise therefore, and build ye the sanctuary of the Lord God, to bring the ark of the covenant of the Lord, and the holy vessels of God, into the house that is to be built to the name of the Lord.

After wrapping up and having a conversation with my girlfriend (whose shift started at 7:30), I cooked some tuna for breakfast. Right after the last bite I felt the coffee had finally worn off, and my eyelids begun to feel heavy. I slept for 3 hours, had lunch, called Pao again, watched a few episodes of the old Batman: Animated Series (up until now I really appreciate the film noir approach they used in the development of this series).

It’s 2:47 p.m. and usually I would be on my way out, driving my mom to do what she had on her list. To my surprise, she hasn’t called me to get ready and go yet, and right now I’m on the couch experiencing a twist of fate: I am now struggling to stay awake just so I could sleep soundly later this evening.

Blogging helps. A few minutes ago I was playing a game on my iPhone (tower defense games grow old for m at a way slower rate). Then I go back to the verse I turned to the morning, the first sentence in particular:

Now set your heart and your soul to seek the Lord your God;

I believe I am led to tune in to the Lord at all times: in peril or comfort, in sickness and in health… And also in productivity or levity. No, boredom. For the past twenty-some years I have been slumping on the couch and turning on the TV, Computer, Phone, and/or other media when I had opportunities to rest.

That has to change. If I depend on the Lord for successful ministry, then I must depend on the Lord for successful convalescence. Indeed, I MUST set my heart and soul to seek the Lord my God… At ALL times.

Lord, forgive me, for part of me does this just to stay awake. But Lord, if my mouth says that You are my all, I want the rest of my being to follow in believing that. You have proven time and time again that You are the strength present in my many inadequacies. I believe now that only You can give the Shalom I need. Let it all be done for Your glory above all… In Jesus Christ’s Name I pray, amen.

God bless you and keep you.

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